This is me, What do you think? Cute?

I have been tagged again! Sigh, I am totally hesitant to do this, but I’m doing this for someone who requested that I be more personal in my blog. I don’t know how to get more personal then to tell you about my childhood.

Have you seen my childhood…..? I can’t remember much of it. I have been asking myself why for years. I’m also going to share that reminiscing on this is very painful for me. For the past few months all I have been trying to do is forget my past. So for the people who requested this please know I’m shaking inside as I write this. I want to burst into tears but I can’t as there are people around me now….

This is because I cannot look back without travelling through the memories that haunt me. For example in trying to think of this, I was brought to remember that I have a picture that means a lot to me about my childhood. I laminated it nicely and gave it to someone I cared about and now it is gone….I don’t even know how to describe how important that picture is to me. Remembering things of my past somehow doesn’t bring back anything good nowadays.

Here now is another of me. This one is me and my bro. Cute? He was way cuter. Still is.

Delivery:

My nickname was rugby head. So Wen Cheang I think we had a little in common although I was not sucked out I think. It was on March 29^th 1983 at 8:30 pm. I made my mom stay in the hospital for more than 12 hours. Too shy to see the world then and I still don’t want to come out. I think I did it just because I love my mom so much.

Name:

It is a simple process as a Chinese member of the family because our surname is ‘Lim’ and ‘Kok’ is what all the boys have on my father’s side. Then the last part of my name is making the Chinese word ‘Weng Yew’ which means ‘glory’. So I’m ‘Weng’ and my brother is ‘Yew’. Our names together meaning Country’s Glory. My English name starts with L as all the rest of my family members do. Leonard, Lillian, naturally little Leonard is Leon then came Lionel see the pattern? One thing you should know is I do not love my name. It has brought me great strife because I believe it’s a God given name that I have to live up to.

My Size:

All you have to know is I came out bigger than my brother, I’m not sure how I’ll end up. At the moment He has beaten me in size….I don’t know if I should challenge him anymore. Hehehe

Interests:

Arranging books. That’s what I’m told. Also I was told I sighed a lot and asked questions like

Leon (3yrs): ‘Sigh, sigh’

Mom: Son why are you sighing so loud?

Leon (3yrs): Jesus said He is coming back soon. Why He still haven’t come back wan? (Malaysian style English; indication of my early love for this country)

Other than that I wouldn’t remember much. Because everything in the world fascinates me til today.

My mini Cagiva!

As you can see, certain interests start at a very young age. I certainly had always been born to ride! Wooohooo!

Reactions towards living things:

My mom said the moment I came out, she knew that I was going to be God’s instrument. So somehow when she said that it felt as if I found what I was created for. Therefore my reaction towards living has only found purpose is what God created. I love animals, trees, insects, and practically everything in nature. I learnt to swim since I was a toddler. I was quiet, hated medicine. But I was often sick…

Best Friends:

You know what? I made really good friends when I was young. I was friendly, outgoing and so much more but now it is definitely not the case. I remember not much of the friends I had. I do remember their names. Charis Liew (the girl in the middle) who was the same age who is a pretty young lady now. Julie Lim, Jeffery Lim, John Lim ( I heard he has a fine voice). Joshua and Joy Ooi. They were those that grew up with me in BCM now if I may say time has drifted us apart. You know what. Thinking back, those were happier times. Not a care in the world.

Favorite TV Shows:

I can’t remember honestly. Macgyver I guess. Still watching the episodes now

Early Talents:

My mom noticed my music talent. I still am puzzled how. I am deeply thankful to God for that for I would not know what I’d do in life without music….Other than that I was an intellectually curious child. A new term I learnt recently. I couldn’t stop wanting to learn all I can. I taught myself as much as I could and would constantly be observing others to learn. I know this as until now this is how I am. One more thing I had this obsession with Maths. My marks were either 99 or 100 in primary school. Haha . But that is because I liked the teacher. Encik Sabdan. I wish for somebody who can tell me how he is now. I also hope he remembers me. In secondary school, I hated the teacher so no more 99-100 haha. So my talent I found out was scoring A’s for the teachers I love ahhaha. Other than that as the picture below suggests, my other talent was torturing my brother.

Greatest Fear:

My greatest fear was people. Still is….sorry I won’t elaborate because it hurts too much ok? I have spent my life living to people’s expectations and yet they……I honestly don’t know why people always look at my faults rather than how much I have given my all for them….

I fear being apart from my parents. I know that I fear of how I would never stop crying when separated from my parents. I also know that it is going to happen again. Soon…..only God can tell.

Favorite Foods:

I don’t know. My mom says I hated medicine. I am picky about that I eat but definitely not as picky as Wen Cheang who was a horror to feed.

Bad habits:

Wanted! The ‘Bad Boys’ bald Mafia ‘Lim’ brothers. They look alike today no change!

My mom says I’m an angel until I was in my teens. Other than that I don’t remember

Entertainment:

Looking back, my happiest moments were on my piano. I remember the faint voice of an angel as I would describe singing with me. I miss that so much. I’m tearing now….God forgive me.

This is enough. It truly hurts so much. I don’t want to remember how beautiful it was. It makes it so painful because the state I am in is pathetic. It makes me feel I just can’t be Leon anymore. I started this blog to indicate my new life that indicate that I’m a new creation a new start and new beginning. I no longer want to look back. So my dear friends, if it’s possible, don’t ask me to look back anymore at the mean time ok?

So there you now know a little more about me. I hope you will really cherish your friendships you have. Don’t lose sight of them. Friends are the gift God gives us to represent His grace. Also love them not because of what they do but love them because God loves them. Always remember to be seasoned with love and forgiveness. Remember always the golden rule. Do only to others what you would want them to do to you. God bless you my friends.

I’m not going to tag anyone this time. But I will have fun reading all that you guys write about. To all my friends. You are dear to my heart. Always. I love you guys!

Tags: childhood, me, tag