My personal preference for bikes are those Super Sport racing types. I personally never fancied any other class of bikes.

Recently my mom came over to stay here for a break and I asked her if I could get this.

This is my dream bike! The Yamaha R6

She said…..but how am I going to sit on this? So uncomfortable…..sighsssss so considering I’m wanting to find a wife so much and how she must feel comfortable sitting behind me; I decided yeah…..I should get my other dream bike….this:

Harley Davidson VROD! Hot Hot

Recently, I fell in love with something more beautiful. It really just makes me want to scream. Perhaps in three years time…this will be mine perhaps both,¬† perhaps all of them!!! hahahaha too greedy.

Honda Fury 2010! I’m melting….

Limited edition Honda Fury 2010! Gosh!

At the moment, I’m very satisfied with what God has provided. Dear baby Cagiva, I miss you. Violet you mean a lot to me.

My Cagiva Mito 125

Violet oh Violet, I can’t live without you now

Losing someone you love is like having a part of you ripped out. It leaves a scar that never heals. Some larger than others depending on how much you need them in your life. You don’t love any less than the other because they all mean the world to you. In this life the fact is you have to depend on another and those who open themselves to be there for you are those you find hardest to let go.

I feel like parts of me are being ripped out of me slowly but surely. The worse part of it is that I have no control whether I lose them or not. It hurts so much that I cannot describe the intensity of the sorrow in my heart. Yet I am not allowed to lose control. I am writing this not because I’m sad or this is a terrible thing as I promised to blog about the good things of life. Surely you will understand why this is good if you follow me on this journey of words until the end.

I had lost the capability to love because I was fearful and afraid. I had my heart ripped out, torn apart and handed back to me in pieces. I never thought I could love again. I told myself that I will not let myself care for anyone in a way that will allow myself to get hurt. But then it happened, something good happened. I loved again.

I was thrown into a foreign place where I practically knew no one. Here was where I discovered I could love again. However now, the life of my dearest brother is threatened beyond my control. I can do nothing but hear news of him. I don’t even dare go to the hospital because I’m ill and I just don’t want any remote possibility of things being worse than it already is. All I can do is pray. Please pray with me for God’s mercy on his life.

In this past month, two of my most beloved friends have somehow turned the cold shoulder to me and I am devastated. I wish they only would know that I love them. Now the life of one of the only family I have here is being threatened and I can’t control anything. Oh God, please help me understand. I hardly even had the chance to know him. But you put this love in us that unites us as one because of You. Hear us, O God. Let him live. Please. Yet not my will be done but Yours.

Still I am grateful for this gift of love you’ve given us. The ability to love unconditionally. To be loved and to give love. As long as I have breathe, I will proclaim that You are good and Your love endures forever.

Pastor David Yeo, we at Grace love you. We will pray and believe for a miracle.

FOREWORD

Everything written here is completely fictional and has a double or even triple meaning. But it probably is so creative that if taken in the wrong context can mean anything you want. To make things clear, this is an attempt to write a post in a more story like manner with the imagination of the future I will have with the person I love.

So the story begins…..

What would the world be without Violet in my life?….I can’t imagine no more. Ever since that day that fatefully brought us together, we have never been separated. The two of us were like the Sun and the Moon, the ocean and the waves, and even the frog and the princess. I never imagined in my life that I’d ever be so privileged to hold her in my arms as the winds blow on our faces. Together, hand in hand we’ll travel wherever the road may lead us.

She accepted me for who I am. Never questioned me and just trusted me as I led the way day by day. She waited for me when I went to work.  Was always there for me after work too. I mean what more can I ask for. How can a man like me ask for more?

On the other hand though, I am but just a man. Violet has always been so patient never making a fuss about anything. Though I push her hard and she dislikes it, all I feel is her little gentle nudge telling me please be gentle. So I oblige cause I have to admit I’m always so quick, too quick. Rushing here and there.

Ever since she has been there for me. Everything in life seems to have become so easy. Like so effortless and weightless. But still I have not been so good to her. Then today she finally got sick. Oh no, I feel so bad. I love her you see. I don’t intend for things like these to happen. Oh my dear Violet are you ok?

You see, whenever I go anywhere I am rather careless and when I need to turn to my left or right, I often rely on her. She would always wink her beautiful golden eyes and people notice that this careless man and people would give leeway to me.

Today she refused to wink. Her eyes became a dull brown. Still even though she was sick she would still faithfully follow me. I felt so bad that I left work earlier to bring her to the doctor. She was there with doctor for a while and the doctor said she has some stomach problems that’s the root of her problems. I left her there, told her I love her and said I would be back later to pick her up. That she should just relax as they took care of her.

Later it was raining but I had to see her again. So I braved the weather to be with her again. There I held her in my arms again. Together we were so happy. She was winking at me again. Her eyes looking even more beautiful and brighter. There she stood smiling and despite both of us strolling in the rain together. I am just so thankful for Violet. Thankful to God that she is in my life. I promise that I will indeed be a better partner to her.

Yet due to her past, she woke up feeling ill again. Her body just wouldn’t start up and she was low on energy, sensing something wrong I quickly brought her to the doctor again. I just hopes she gets better soon. Cause I care so much for her.

Here’s how it goes….I received an sms from a friend telling me wonderful news! Lea Salonga is coming to town for a musical! My heart beat raised 10 notches up it’s normal BPM. I have to go. I have to!

For those who don’t know, I have blogged that she is my favoritest singer of all time. But the price, well, I’ll pay anything. Still it was wiser to just calm down before I made a decision. So I thought about it then this thought popped in my head. How am I supposed to be going alone? My heart beats another 10 notches faster. That would be no fun at all. But I don’t know who to ask out. This has to be a very special night for me. A momentous occasion. And I want to go out with someone special.

So I decided by faith to do this. I bought two tickets! The concert is in January and I hope to go with someone special on that day! The tickets are costly but I certainly want to make this a night I will never forget. Heart is beating out of control!!!

The date and time has been confirmed. 11 January 2009 . 8pm . Partner…..is non-existent at the moment. Pray with me. I really want to just have a moment where time stands still. I can’t believe I am actually doing such a thing. Who knows it could just be a night with a very good friend or maybe even a day where Leon works up the guts to ask perhaps a beautiful young lady for a date. Who knows? I certainly don’t.

It is not these tickets but I just had to put a pic for me to visualize it.

Maybe it is like I said about me being a ‘hopeless romantic’ meaning just hoping for my happily ever after once more. Maybe I will just end up watching it alone. I also wonder if people would actually appreciate that night with me. Oh no, I’m starting to doubt. I don’t know what got over me that I was just so so so like on another planet and now I have two tickets. What should I do?

How do you feel as a Malaysian after seeing this? What do you think is the message of this video?

These words mean a huge amount or the entire worlds to some and to some it totally it is totally meaningless. Some dismiss these words of as mere fantasy. Some hold them fast as dreams that drive them to live.

It never dawned upon these tiny brain of mine that I would sit down here, in tears writing to you about these three words that had brought me shambles. It will also surprise you or maybe shock you what inspired me to think through these three profound words. It was the movie ‘Ever After’ starring the young Drew Barrymore looking lovely.

I was crying so much that I am ashamed to talk about it. I realized that all of us actually have this longing for a Happily Ever After. I denied that. I’m a hopeless romantic meaning hopeless at being romantic. Romance was something I criticized for as long as I can remember. If you had a post earlier on talking about love. I am still a firm believer that movies, music and many other things have distorted what real love is. That being said it would also seem I have lost faith in love itself without realizing.

I must admit I don’t know how this happened as I claimed to understand what love is (not the full extent) but I have experienced it myself. I don’t know how losing the person you love with all your heart can make you turn so bitter and hurt but it did. I couldn’t love anyone even myself. That’s how I felt.

Seeing this show and about how love is so simple and beautiful, I am reminded once again that it’s not because of who I am, but because of what You’ve done, not because what I’ve done, but because of who You are. I am in love all over again. In love with the ONE that has never ever let me go.

I have this romantic dream now of loving my future partner as much as I have felt loved by the ONE who set me free.

My dearest Miracle is proof that dreams do come true. She is a pure example of romantic dreams and wishful thinking. Sometimes if you think about it, how amazing is this gift of life? Although somehow I still don’t know how I ended up as her God-father. I know I will never be able to stop loving her. Oh, Just imagine how much more God loves me! Mike care to fill me in on this?

Come to think of it, God is so romantic. And I’m looking forward to this happily ever after with Him. Thats all I can long for right now. Though in my heart I pray I will find someone to love as well.

I want to be a prince charming.

I want to be a knight in shining armor.

I want to rescue my maiden off her feet.

I want to be all she dreams of

I want to sing her a love song

Make her world bright.

If only it was so easy to make things to ensure our ever afters. But the best that I can ensure that I will love her with all of my heart. I now understand why God had chose marriage to signify His relationship with the church. Pretty amazing. Pretty romantic. I’m sure if we strive through these hard times together, we’ll have our haplily ever afters someday, someday. Its just one lifetime for the next eternity.

This is written for all my friends who have fallen into love and out of love. Remember your first love. In it you’ll find the strength to go through anything come what may, come what may.

Have you ever fell in love? I have…in fact I believe I didn’t just fall in love but truly loved. Yet no matter how I see it, I still question. What is this thing called love?

In my humble opinion, we live in a generation that has a warped up idea of love. We have limited the definition of love until it becomes nothing more than a feeling of attraction. Romance dominates every single movie you see. Without it the movie will be a flop.

Love in fact is a universal language that everyone supposedly knows about. If love was taken away from life, there is no life. So then why is love such an important part of our life yet we hardly know or want to know what love is?

So what is this thing called LOVE? I honestly would like to hear from other people’s perspective on what love is.

I believe love is a deliberate choice. It is not based on feelings nor emotions but a choice to love someone for just who they are. I could never ask my parents not to love me. They have chosen to and will love me.

Of course I could write a whole paper on this. But what is love to you? We hear statements being thrown around such as ‘you don’t love me anymore’ or ‘you don’t know what love is’ or even ‘ I don’t love you anymore’. Can we actually define what true love is? I believe we can.

So dear friends,

Maybe you can answer it this way….the first section answer what you think is not love or is commonly misinterpreted as love.

The second section.. write what love really is.

Please contribute….I believe this can develop into something really interesting. You may ask why I suddenly raise this question? Maybe I’m just struggling to find out and answer to this question so much.