I have finally done Chapter 2 of about me. So head over and read all the boring stuff about who I am. Haha. Actually I just followed the previous format due to lack of creative ideas. I initially wanted to do more.

Oh well maybe tell me what you all want to know about me more and I will add it in?

Cheers!!

Sincerely,

Leon Lim

A prose I wrote early this morning

Prose: is writing that resembles everyday speech.

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I think I’m in love,

I really really think I’m in love,

I thought I could love,

But history says otherwise,

So I think I’m in love,

But I will never be able to love or be loved.

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It feels like life is worth living when I see your face,

My heart beats a different tune, a sound that is just so unfazed,

You represent all the beauty of life and brought meaning to a world that is messed up

Yet I feel so happy, yet I feel so sad.

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I wish you all the happiness that life could offer

I wish you all the the joy

I can offer no such moments

I can only offer you my heart

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I think I’m in love

Oh I think I’m in love

With You

Then I sent it to someone just to find out an opinion and it became a song….should I attempt to put a melody to this?? : Read the rest of this entry »

Hi, I apologise for the lack of reviews recently. There are two reasons:

Reason one. I have been recently just been trying to focus my creative juices to arrange and rearrange songs and write a song. I have a deadline. Problem is I get so confused and unable to think if I am focused on other material other than my own work. I promise you, when I get the chance to listen I will. I just want to be listening and not just hearing.

Reason two. I noticed that my album review posts are the least popular. Comments are low and visits are rare. I’m guessing it has to be the nature of the review being hard to comment about. At the same time i don’t know if it has actually benefitted anyone. Has it? I can’t even be sure. I guess I am focused on doing things that are purposeful because time is getting more and more hard to find.

Overall, I miss hearing good albums. Some people may even be doubting the objectivity and whether my reviews are serious or not. All I can say often times in these matters it is a matter of perspective. But my opinions are sincere.

I also write for the benefit of those who don’t know what albums to buy seeing the vast amounts of choices and the lack of financial health to just buy. Cd’s in Malaysia and here are expensive I have to admit. But I don’t believe that if we can afford it that we should be downloading it or copying it. In a way it is my attempt to also encourage you all to buy and hear good music.

Enough said. I have been lacking in posts only because I have to be with my parents while they are here. It has been great having them here. I just wish i had more time to spend with them. I feel awfully weak also, like I’m falling sick….yet I don’t know. I will swim now to get rid of this massive blues. see ya!

Have you ever wanted to be famous? Be recognized for your gifts? I have. It was quite recent that I had a spell where I felt like I was nobody and that my life and gifts were just so unappreciated. In fact I feel like I have no gifts at all. Don’t ask me why I felt that way but I certainly did. Personally I have been finding it hard to take it in because there are a huge amount of people looking down on others. I just don’t get why artists are so arrogant.

Oh well my dreams of being a superstar is often thwarted by the fact I just want the recognition without the fame and fortune. Maybe I will have to die like our dear Vincent. One day a song may be written about me that is as beautiful as ‘Starry, Starry Night’.

Oh well today, I finally get the feeling of what a green screen video shoot feels like. Very interesting. In the pic you see my boss working on his script. Behind is the green screen so we can add visual effects perhaps? Make it Star Wars like hahaha. No la just joking.

I just had three lines to say. But again a problem arose. I am supposed to smile and talk. I did but smiling made my eyes too small. Sigh……looks like I am not photogenic. That means stardom is far from what I can achieve. I’m probably one that will die and nobody will remember my face. Hahaha. As long as I am remembered then I guess it’s ok.

Still I know I’m no superstar nor am I meant to be one. I just hope that I can live with my ego bruised and pray that God will take pride in this broken vessel.

At long last, today, I got to sink myself in the vast coolness of a bluish chlorine filled pool. Ok ok that didn’t sound exciting….hahaha but it surely was exciting. So much so I was so eager to rush out of the house that I forgot my towel the first time. Then I forgot my keys the second time. Hahha.

Boy was I shivering when I got in but I just put on my Arena goggles, kicked started my engine and went into it at full speed to warm myself. Oh it was just amazing! Just so relaxing. I’m going to do it again definitely tomorrow. Anyone care to join me? Hahaha.

That being said, its a nice pool. It even has small waterfalls and a slide. I wonder if I can fit in it…..hmmm. Went to try to go up to the gym but I couldn’t go up I’m not sure why. Plus I found that there was a snooker table there too. Nice. If only I could find a partner to play with.

Perhaps if I keep this up, I can lose the weight I gained from my sad sad past. Hahaha. I just feel like singing ‘just keep swimming, just keep swimming’ but I don’t remember where I heard it from. Does anyone of you remember?

We were at camp and people were asking me whats the difference between an Emu and an Ostrich? Well this is an Emu!! That’s the look people give me when they hear what I do. hahaha

I’ve had this question thrown at me a million times. What do you actually do? Hahaha. It is a hard question to answer. Somehow when I explain what my job is, people think I don’t have much to do. It is puzzling why whenever anything is associated with the arts people cannot quantify it as work. I mean what is so hard to understand? I do work…..I don’t sit around and shake my leg and get paid. Haha.

In my line of work it is just not something people can relate to. Deadlines and schedules and paperwork is something everyone can relate to but what in the world does Leon actually do??! This post is an attempt to justify that I am working very very hard! Hahahahaha Read the rest of this entry »

Dear all,

I have just came back from a wonderful break from all the stress of trying to be who I ought to be and just had a few days where I could be who I am inside. I let my hair down. Got some chopped off. Rode my beloved bike. And heard my God-daughter call me with her cute little voice ‘Kai Yeh’ which means God-father in Cantonese. It is just soooooo moving.

I have come back very happy but groggy due to the terrible journey. I mean its not that terrible la but I hate traveling. Makes me so sick. But given the recent whole lot of activities and work in my life, it has taken a tow toll on my blogging. I have not been able to write because I never could live with my blog kinda badly done. I always want to give my best.

At the moment I am gathering all the pictures to show you what has happened to me over the past few days. It’s like so memorable to me. I have to write about it.

Oh well this was written to tell you all….. Prepare….I am going to flood you all with posts muahaha. I hope I can find time though hahaha. Also I really hope to receive a flood of comments too. I miss my readers opinions so much.

I’m still recovering from the ordeals of my bike adventure of a total of maybe 500km throughout the entire holiday. And massive adrenaline rush that makes me feel happy but more like a junkie now without those excitements anymore. Hahaha no la tomorrow I will attempt to go for a swim. Pretty exciting already. Still I think that plan will fail again.

Till tomorrow then. I’m a happy man just to happy.

Avalon, Avalon, Avalon. What can I say….. I love that word. Ever since I was hooked on to King Arthur when I was a little boy. Thing is, I have been a fan of Avalon for both the wrong reasons and right reasons. I have this little huge admiration towards this particular female singer in this group. She’s really pretty to me. And when she sings…..sigh….I become weak. I think this is some sort of voice crush. Sad thing is that she left Avalon. And ever since then its not been the same for me. I still bought two other albums that came out after she and another guy left but I must say I didn’t get the wow feeling out of those.

This is Cherie Adams. Isn’t she pretty? So sad she left. So So sad

So when I saw this album on the rack….I was like….should I really spend the money on something I may not like? Well I turned to the back to read first before I decided. First thing you should look for is the producer. This usually determines how good the album will be. What kind of style it would be. What kind of sound it will have. Most of the time this works. Not all the time though. So start looking out for producers. You will hear what I mean.

Then I saw the song list. I was like man! These are my favorite songs. I mean I have been listening for years and there are songs that become your favorites. This album contained so many songs I love. So I decided to buy it praying that they didn’t ruin my favorite songs. Hahaha. It’s already done how to change that fact….hahaha pray also no use.

First song….ok ok la. They didn’t do too much to change it. It has the same feel as the original for those of you who heard it before. But of course with better quality. As I went on, hearing these old time favorites sparked something in me I cannot describe. As I heard the album as a whole I must say I like this album so much more than the past two ones. One reason being the vocals seem to be giving me the old Avalon feel again which I loved. I’m glad for that. I must say nothing particularly stood out as impressive to me. But I liked the album very much. Still somehow the song ‘El-shaddai’ still gives me a kick every time.

They brought a guest artist Russ Taff in to do an old song and that was so nice. So if you want to hear some of the old favorites but don’t appreciate the old sound. I think this album did those songs justice. It is also very pleasurable to hear the Avalon sound again. I’ve heard this album through 5 times now. I haven’t got bored with it so that must be a good sign. Though I must say I have fallen asleep on the train while listening to it too. It is either I’m too tired or it is too soothing hahaha.

So what do I think of this album? Get it. It is one of the better album’s I’ve heard among the new ones. Also I want listeners to hear these marvelously written songs with tremendous meaning. These songs itself make the album well worth it.

Rating : 8/10

It was Saturday night. I was weary from work. Dragging my feet home with the feeling like I didn’t want to even shower I lay on my bed. This is going to be a long night. A very long night. Before I knew it, I dozed off. Suddenly…..I just was jerked by the thought that I’m late! And Yes I AM LATE!

Tomorrow is going to be a very exciting day and I am not prepared at all. I am moving to a new place! With a swimming pool, gym and tennis courts. Two beautiful parks reside at both ends of the condo and I just am truly sooooo excited. But I have not packed anything up yet!!!!!

At last though after much stuffing and stepping, I fit everything in except the load of clothes that I just hanged up to dry. By the time I got to lay my head on the pillow here for the last time it was 4 am. But not long later I was jerked up by the sound of my alarm clock. I quickly got dressed then rushed to church carrying two boxes of stuff that made me take a taxi in the end though it burnt a hole in my pocket sob sob.

In the back of my head I just kept thinking about moving but I had so many things and responsibilities too. I had a meeting in the afternoon to attend. At last it has come the time to move but it is already 9pm. My pastor was kind enough to drive the church van for me and the church helper also came. I was so touched that they were so willing to help.

By the time we were headed to my new nest, I was drenched in sweat and my heart was beating a whole lot faster. But soon very soon I will be home!! My home for the next few years! But the main attraction for me is the swimming pool.

This is a pic of the swimming pool from far. I haven’t even gone near it….sob sob

At last when we were done unloading everything into the room,  it was already 11pm. No chance to dip in the pool. Sigh. Until today I have yet to find the time to dip in the pool! Sob Sob.

My only consolation is that I am going back to my real home in Malaysia today! At last. At long last I will be able to go home. Excitement fills the air for this whole week. Oooo it is just a nice feeling ain’t it?

I wonder how many people are as excited to see me though….hmmm

Update: Sad news the Spam beats Comments terribly now 990-788

Dear readers,

I’m pleased to announce to you that this blog has reached it’s half a year mark! Wooohoo. I can’t believe it has been that long. Over this period of time I’m glad to say that I’m so happy that you all have been there to read, support and encourage me to write more and more. Though the opposite seems to be happening hahaha

So here I am ready to give you some statistics about this blog:

Firstly, over this 6 months, I have had 25,761 visits to this blog (as of the time I wrote this blog)! Wooohoo isn’t that great. Averagely there are 222 visits a day. Pretty amazing. Now this doesn’t mean you should visit this blog less ok?…..visit it more hehehe

As of this month I have 15.7 percent of my readers from my homeland Malaysia!!! 13.41percent from the Netherlands. 7.94 percent from US commercial, 7.63 from Singapore and the rest from many other countries.

I have written 105 posts. With contributions as well.  Wow I can’t believe I wrote so much. I have also received a total of 774 comments. Thank you all again!

This has been above and beyond what I imagined blogging to be like. I did this to begin with just wanting to stay in touch with the people I care about. And here I am at this point. I also know that these statistics are nothing compared to other websites but I am so glad and encouraged that people would find something they can relate to in my blog.

There is just a little request though. I just saw my spam statistics and currently there are a total of 764 spam comments. I was like….whoa how can the spam be so close to the real comments. It has recently rapidly rose in quantity and the comments on my blog has rapidly declined also hahaha. So can you readers give feedback on what I can do to help you comment more? Also can you all just comment more. I would love to always be able to say that my blog has more comments that spam. Haha.

I just thought I’d share these statistics to you guys to really thank the people who visit this blog regularly. when I read them I was really encouraged. I hope to do better and better so please give me your input. Still I can only do what’s within my power and energy and time to encourage you too.

I am curious though….why do you all read this blog? Can share please?

p.s - I have been reading many of your blogs too. Enjoy them very much. Just didn’t have the time to comment. Soon, very soon I will be able to do that again. Cheers!

Update: The spam box has just beaten the comments box. 777-776. Very sad. very sad

For those of you who have been concerned for me and praying for me, thank you. I think I am better now….but I’m not sure. It is too long a story to elaborate. I also am really backdated on my posts here. I promised some posts but really can’t find the time to deliver them ahhh!!

Still there is more to fear. I mean I am a full fledge Malaysian. Ever since I stepped here I always told of the fact that I love my country and I am proud to be Malaysian. Yet…..hearing things like……you’re Malaysian? You sound Singaporean…..and things like…..you don’t look Malaysian….has got me worried too. Am I transforming in just two months? Noooooo…

Recently the signs are showing…..I started out as a person in the MRT looking around and observing people with much interest. But now….it seems I have assimilated in. Let me tell you why. My bro brought his IPOD down the other time and made a joke, taking it off he said, I’m Malaysian now….putting it on, I’m Singaporean now. Yes, I tell you everywhere you walk you see people with wires dangling down their necks and walking at lightning speed.

I resisted from morphing into that being but is seems impossible to withstand anymore. I mean, I tried reading but because I had to stand most of the time and the train is moving, that leaves me with a massive headache in the end. So for a few weeks I just stood there. Then at last…….two days ago….I was walking with earphones on….

I noticed when some Malaysian friends came that I was walking faster then them. Oh no…..I’m not turning in to a Singaporean am I? Oh boy……

It has been some time since I blogged, and don’t worry I have not neglected this blog and no it is far away from dying an unnatural death. My target is to beat Adino’s 400th post and go far and beyond. Congrats ‘Si Fu’! Just that blogging is part of my life now. Only thing the adjustment to the new life has certainly got me all unable to catch up with even reading the comments some times.

Does the title of this post catch your attention? It got me thinking today. I had been here, just making it through some of the roughest moments of my life. Still yet the perception people get about me is that I’m happy, friendly, nice, and just so well to do! All assume that all is well with me. I also assumed all is well. I feel great I mean I have had more dreams come true in these few months than in almost all the many years of my life put together.

Then something happened that startled me. The sight of blood coming from my own body, First thought, was that from me? I mean am I bleeding? How could I be bleeding? I’m fine. I checked and realised, the blood was mine indeed. Now this means I really have to go to the doctor as this is not a very good symptom. Why am I bleeding……! I mean there is no pain….

In a state of utter shock, I sat on my chair and emotions flood my body like a massive waterfall. I was losing control. I was shaking. I had mastered pain so much that I was living on it. Pain is what drives me each day. It probably lets me know I’m alive but to a greater extent became the very essence of my everyday life. So much so I was hurting all over and I didn’t know it consciously. I mean I was sitting there, and I realised there was pain where it bled from. I never realised all this time.

When I started to realise that pain, thats when my emotions flood me with all the pain I was hiding inside me. People often talk about a low threshold but here I was constantly raising the threshold bar and I didn’t realise it. I am hurting. Real badly emotionally and physically my body was washed out by my abuse of it. I can only pray the bleeding is not the beginning of a disaster to come but a reminder by the One on high to realise that I am killing myself.

I remember Pastor preaching about pain being a gift. A sign and gift from God to help us realise something is wrong. Something is really wrong. The good news is that I realise now partially that there is a problem. The bad news is I cannot fathom the extent of the damage already done.

The good news is I have a good God who can easily remove all these hindrances. The bad news is I am not sure if I had numbed so much pain that I cannot hear Him too. I should have realised in those quiet moments why I was tearing so much. There was so much pain inside. At least I have a promise that I can release all my burdens because God cares for me. Certainly this is what I’m going to try. Yet, I am afraid, shaken.

Watching the Olympics I see every athlete trying to break the pain barrier. Looking at those ladies lifting up 154kg was painful! I remember reading an interview with a top gymnast and she was asked what was key to her being able to be a gymnast. Her answer was, how much pain she could bear. Looking at them it surely hurts but they have become used to it. Is that really good? The world certainly teaches us its good if you want to be successful to do so. But should we really be ignorant of that fact that we’re in pain. How many of us can actually know our limits? Seeing the weight-lifter’s elbow snap certainly told me that it is a very risky business. In life one casualty is called acceptable losses but in the kingdom of God, there is no such thing as acceptable losses. You either make it or you break it!

I now know that success does not lie in how much pain I can bear or even how long I can bear it. It is about realising that the pain we bear can be carried by someone who did so on the cross over two thousand years ago. He is willing and asks us to even cast it all upon Him for He cares for us. There is no glory here in winning any medal for being the most successful in your own right. There is only a prize awaiting all those who wait upon the Lord for they shall renew their strength, they shall mount up on wings like eagles. They shall run and not grow weary, They shall walk and not faint.

Are you carrying, burying, hiding, numbing, ignoring, covering, concealing, distorting or maybe even owning your pain? It is not yours to carry. God will carry it for you. When we stop trying to master our pain and start realising who is the master of our pain then life will indeed reach its fullest potential and glory for our Lord and Saviour, Jesus Christ. Who is the Master of Pain? You…..???

On a more serious note, pray for me. If the bleeding doesn’t stop, it means something VERY BAD is happening to me. Even if it stops, reading up on it has made me also see that it could be a prelude to something even worse.

If any of you wonder whether you are young or old….I have come up with a formula that works! The type of music that drives you will tell. Hehe. This album can be a good judge of that! So those of you who dare takes the risk get this album.

When I put it into my player and turned up the volume the first thought was this sounds so alike to Parachute Band’s - Roadmap and Revelations album. Rock based music that is more of the popular music side than hardcore rock. I like it a lot. Tracks like ‘All because of Jesus’, ‘Faithful’ and ‘You are the Light’ are my favorites and I hope to see them being used in my church someday for worship. Young people will love the energy!!

Oh I forgot to mention that this supposed to be a worship song album. My personal opinion is that not all songs here can work in a church unless they are all young people. Even so I may not agree as a Pastor to some of them being sung in our congregation. That being said, I like the songs as they drive so much power into the theme of the song making it somewhat like powerful anthems.VERY NICE!

Musically, this album was well produced but I kinda felt like it was an anti climax at the end. Still I was not wowed at anything in particular except the energy. I also wished that they included the sheet music like other worship albums.

But this album is getting rather popular…so maybe I am wrong. Still I was not caught like I was with Parachute’s Album. I must say though that there aren’t many rock worship song albums that are good out there and indeed this is one of the better ones. So if you like rock and are tired with the worship style albums that don’t suit you. Get this one.

Album Rating: 6.8/10

I’ve been laughed at, mocked, ridiculed, stoned and even persecuted for many years because of this. I mean give me a break it is not my interest nor my art. Yet this is something I cannot escape. For our need to partake of this thing call food has driven man to creatively and instinctively go the distance. But as for me, I am a simple man. I eat to live, not live to eat. If I could, I would want to be able to sustain my life without the constant need to become hungry and eat.

Still God has made me this way but unlike my father and brother who have this distinct joy in the area of food. I really don’t share the same enthusiasm. Worse still, I mean cooking!! Why is it so hard, can’t we just eat it raw? Well I have to admit even though I dislike eating even raw food can be rather distasteful. So well I left the cooking to my family members all these years since they find pleasure in it.

Since I have been here, I have only had the pleasure of eating home-cooked food once. The rest of the time I’m out eating or stuffing myself with my favorite cornflakes. Once in a blue moon I cook a little instant noodles to whet my appetite but I really miss the food back home. Singapore food is just not as good. Sigh.

So I embarked on a mission today since I finally get to be home early. I decided to cook! Muahaha. Yes I can feel the eyes staring at me and all that ‘what!’ faces. That’s why I wrote my first sentence! My culinary skills is nothing to shout about but I really thought I’d try to save some money and cook. I got out my ingredients and with no idea or plan. I cooked. If cooks were to see me cook, they’d faint. I won’t tell you what I did lest I be laughed at again.

In the end, I cooked myself a meal! Yes I did, and the kitchen didn’t burn down. In fact I cooked myself a sumptuous meal. Too much! Haha. I cooked a meal that at least 3 people could consume. Worse still I was planning to in the end cook instant noodles to eat with the dishes but I realised it wouldn’t taste nice with noodles. So I cooked rice instead haha. Here is what the dishes looked like.

My recipe of Potato Stew, Broccoli, Egg omelet with carrots and sausages. What do you think? Its not as beautiful as the picture above but well I’m extremely satisfied and happy. I have achieved something I have never achieved in my life. I am so proud of myself. I think though this is not going to happen again for a long long time. Hahahaha.

Least to say, I didn’t manage to finish even half of everything. So I have remainders for at least two more days. Hehehe. Do I deserve some praise?